Thursday, August 02, 2007
Identity. You are born with it; you can change it; you can create a new one; you can have yours stolen. It is a right and a privilege… something that is unique. But some days I feel like my identity fits as well as a cardboard box. When you look at me, you can not see who I am… the curves of my body or the presence of spirit. You see what you want to see… but you don’t see me. And so I created Arwen… the dreamer… the writer… my twin, and yet so different from me. She finds beauty in tragedy, spins tales to ease pain that emanates from deep scares. She scares me, and challenges me, and begs to not be kept silent… but Elissa quiets her voice. Elissa makes writing hard… but Arwen… her words float across paper before they are even thought… Arwen is the writer… Elissa is just complicated.
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2 comments:
Have we both created the people that are all of what we want to be - fearless, inspired, whole, simple and deep at once - I know I have that person inside of me though there are so many others as well and I slip into them, one by one; they are not masks, I think; I don't know exactly, but I think of many faceted diamonds.
it makes more sense when you say it :) But I would so much like someday to be her... I think you know
C
I think sometimes that maturity is the melding of the person you want to be with the person you are... it is the realization that what you have is what the world craves... even when they don't know it. It is the process of being able to go into the world unabashed... to simply be as you were created... to love with abandon, to live with a peace in knowing who you are and who you are in relation to the world. There are always pieces of ourself that we hide... but I find as I get older I no longer care what others think of the treasures I hold deep within me, because they are the jewels and the garments that have been given to me by the Father... they can not be stolen, moth eaten or mildewed... they are what makes me me... Arwen or Elissa... they are my jewels...
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