Twisting Reality

You are the embodiment of the pain I did not want you to feel.
Driven by the losses that have permeated your childhood.
The losses I tried to protect you from, but couldn't.
Like a rotating wheel is the rerunning of injuries that passes as therapy
Turning and twisting situations, playing a different role each time,
In replaying it your own way, you try to make it better.
Try to prove that it wasn't your fault.
You try to figure out who to blame,
Try to do it better.
Hind sight is twenty twenty, they say
But it is reality shifted on its axis.
It's not the solace you seek, it is repetition.

The Minions

I have been silent.
The pressure of welling words whispers from within and I can no longer stop the torents from tumbling forth.
I must write.
My research, as I have called it, has taken me down dark roads,
to painful places I wish only to wash with words,
What loss.  I am still here.  Eternity by grace I'm sure. 
Fragments of a lives I thought I'd live whirl mischieviously in my head.
Hundreds of plot lines, pushing forward for attention.
Waiting for their endings.
If I do not give them what they want,
They will take me under.
Drown me.
Ironically, they only want to be heard.